Praying on a bike

Our loving neighbour Sister Alice was another person who disapproved of my participation in the Across Canada cycling tour. It was during our buffet lunch before Christmas that I told her about the tour and my intention to take part, and she echoed my wife in suggesting that I shouldn’t, saying that the tour would be too much of a challenge for me. It was perfectly understandable that the 81-year-old senior would have concerns about my wellbeing should I embark on the long journey which she considered hard and risky. It would have been reassuring to have her endorsement, but I appreciated that the disapproval was out of love and concern.

It was heartening that when I told Sister Alice in April that I had signed up for the event despite her well-meant advice, she said that she fully respected my decision and was happy that I committed myself to something that obviously meant a lot to me. I was even more grateful that, a couple of weeks later, she gave me a copy of an article called Praying on the run, on which she wrote “on a bike” under the words “on the run”, which clearly expressed her meaning that what the article says about running is applicable to my biking trip. I also saw this as a gesture of her support to the trip.

I read the article and found it to be an excellent piece. The central idea is that the “great-to-be-alive” feeling that comes with regular, vigorous exercise stimulates the brain centre and determines our spiritual receptivity to God and our fellow humans. As per the title, the “regular, vigorous exercise” the article focuses on is jogging, but the message applies to other kinds.

According to the article, there are three main reasons why a regimen of jogging can be beneficial to our prayer life:

1. It is helpful for the total disciplining of our lives. 2. The astringent effect of physical exertion provides a stimulus to our intellectual and emotional faculties, resulting in a more perceptive and warmer devotional spirit. 3. A great deal of pleasure is derived from jogging, leading to the general sense of well-being that accompanies the conditioned body.

The writer argues that our “spirit, soul and body” are interrelated aspects of our being. The weakness of our body is the cause of our inability to meditate and lift our hearts in prayer. Despite a thousand lovely thoughts, we often fail to act. The point is supported with the following quotes:

“The spirit is willing, but nature is weak,” said the Lord. (Matthew 26:41)
“Hell is paved with good intentions.” (Samuel Johnson)

So we need to move from the good intentions to the real starting line of physical and spiritual fitness. Rejuvenating the body through physical exertion will invigorate the soul, bringing us the created closer to the Creator. Such effort is necessary for, as these lines quoted from The Kneeling Christian says:

“God will not do some things unless we work. He stores the hills with marbles, but he has never built a cathedral. He fills the mountains with iron ore, but he never makes a needle or a locomotive. He leaves that to us. We must work.”

The close relationship between spirit, soul and body and how the improvement of the body leads to that of the others are ideas which dawn on me these days when I physically exert myself every day to get ready for the cycling tour. Very often, I pray on a (stationary) bike and reap the benefit of it.

Training is hard, but also joyful

Earlier this morning, I heard a 70-year-old Nova Scotia man called Chris Anderson, who has been running in 29 consecutive Boston marathons and looking to do his 30th, say on TV: “We marathoners often joke that ‘running a marathon is easy; It is the marathon training that is the hard part.’”

What he said definitely strikes a chord for me who now undergo hard daily training so as to be ready for the 7,515 km bike ride in a few weeks’ time. According to the principles of training overload and progressive overload, for the training to be effective and beneficial, one has to keep challenging himself to do something he presently cannot do, then give it time to recover and adapt. Naturally, such training is hard because one is constantly pushing himself to face and overcome new hardship. I can definitely testify to that. Very often, the overload introduced in my training, which is beyond what my current physical condition can handle, leads to breathlessness, discomfort or even pain so tortuous that it takes tremendous willpower to resist the temptation to give up.

Paradoxically, though, the hardship is also where the pleasure of the training lies. I do not mean just the outcome - of seeing progress made, of being able to go beyond previous ‘limits’. Such triumphs are, of course ,the source of sheer joy. But the process itself, with (not despite) all the sweat and blood, can also be joyful. To allow capacity to enjoy the process, I have to screen out the feelings of fear and doubts, the mindfulness of the challenge, and the sensations in the forms of discomfort and pain. Then, and only then, will I be able to focus on the effort and repetition and experience the joy. I find it useful to pay attention to my breathing. I also find it useful to recite prayers. My favourite is the following Taizé lyrics:

Jésus le Christ, lumière intérieure, ne laisse pas mes ténèbres me parler. 
Jésus le Christ, lumière intérieure, donne-moi d’accueillir ton amour.

Its message about not letting my darkness speak to me and enabling me to welcome the love of Jesus is very relevant to the situation of hard exercising.

So, yes, I agree with Chris Anderson that training is the hard part, but I have to say that it is also where joy is. He did not say it, but I am sure this is also what he has experienced.

I was wrong about fitness centres, and the people using them

I used to detest and despise going to the gym, thinking that it is the most boring form of exercise in the planet. When I was in Hong Kong, whenever I walked past the glass windows of fitness centres in commercial buildings, I would privately sneer at the people I saw running on treadmills. “Do they have a problem? Are there no better things to do than trapping themselves here running like caged mice on wheels?” Surely, exercising outdoors, be it jogging, biking, tennis or whatever, is a whole lot more fun.

Now that I am going to the gym almost on a daily basis, I can see how prejudiced I was. I see this change of views as having anything to do with cognitive dissonance, Leon Festinger's social psychological theory which posits that humans seek to adjust their attitudes and actions to ease their mental discomfort caused by internal psychological inconsistency. It is just that, eventually, after my firsthand experience, I am able to see what an interesting place a fitness centre really is.

Given Charlottetown’s small population, it is rare that one would find a place with a lot of visitors. But the fitness centre is definitely one such place. Regardless of which time of the day or which day of the week I go there, there are always quite a lot of people. And very different people, too. People of different ages, sexes, races, size and shapes. They do different exercises and engage themselves in different manners. While they may or may not have specific goals like myself, what is obvious is that they are looking to make physical improvement through their physical effort. And a fitness centre, with a full range of equipment, workout data, programs and personnel, is the perfect place to achieve that. That is probably why this gym I go to is one of the most visited places in small Charlottetown.

Reading and getting ready for «Distance Cycling»

Since coming back from Hong Kong, I have undertaken to prepare for the Across Canada charity cycling tour (and, as a by-product, tackle the expanded waistline). I have joined a local gym as a member. I have also been re-reading the excellent book «Distance Cycling» by John Hughes and Dan Kehlenbach. I am under no illusion that the ten-week tour will be easy and certainly do not underestimate its demands on my physical fitness. The last thing I want is to be a burden to the group so I have to get myself 110 percent ready when the event starts in June.

Based on my reading, I realise that the training is to be targeted at improving both endurance and power, enabling me to overcome long rides and steep climbs. For these, the body has two different energy systems to tap into: the aerobic system (metabolizing carbohydrate and fat for energy) and the lactic acid system (metabolizing carbohydrate to form lactate and regenerate adenosine tri-phosphate (ATP)). Both systems have to be improved.

Obviously then, I need to do aerobic base training to build the necessary endurance and resistance training to enhance muscular strength and power.

Among other things, the aerobic base training is to enable:

• the muscle and liver to store more carbohydrates 
• the respiratory system to bring more oxygen to the circulation system 
• the heart to pump more blood to the workout muscles 

The resistance training will be targeted at the specific strengths required for cycling, namely, core strength, leg strength and upper body strength.

For the training to be effective, there are different principles to follow. To me, the three most important ones are:

• Training overload – When asked to do something it cannot, the body adapts so it can handle the new workload. 
• Progressive overload – The body adapts best when the overloads (both in volume and intensity) are introduced progressively. 
• Stress and recovery – Most adaptations occur when the body is resting, not during the training. Recovery is an integral aspect of conditioning. To keep improving, the body needs time to rebuild. 

In sum, in the next two months, I am to undergo a strict and specific training regime to achieve the goal of improving my endurance and power so that I may survive the 7,515 km trip across Canada in summer.

Never far from the madding crowd

Just as people who have not seen each other for a long time are able to detect physical changes of each other at the moment of reunion, when I came back to Hong Kong after being away for a year, I was able to make observations about the people that I had taken for granted my whole life.

What struck me most was Hong Kong people is that there are such a lot of them. This may sound like truism, but coming back from Prince Edward Island, the population density of which is only about 1/250 of Hong Kong (and the island is already Canada’s most densely populated province!), I couldn’t help notice that I was always among a crowd of people.

Having so many people around is likely to make one feel they are too close for comfort. This may be the case even in the countryside where one is supposed to be able to get away from it all. In two or three hikes I did during the trip, I had to adjust my pace because there had been other hikers close by walking in the same pace as me and the hiking partner(s) I was talking to. I just didn’t like sharing our conversations with strangers or disturbing others with our speech. 

With so many people around, one cannot be bothered with etiquette. In a sparsely populated country like Canada, people do not cross path frequently. And when they do, they are quick to give way or apologise if they do get in the way of each other. Not in Hong Kong. The large number of commuters, most of whom are in a hurry, always strive to get a step ahead of others. It always happens that one commuter cuts across another, just six inches in front, and neither has an issue with it. Just don’t bump into each other or step on each others’ toes.

Not only are most people in a hurry but also they look cheerless or wear a long face. Knowing this birthplace of mine well, I am guessing that for some it may be a sense of self-importance while for others it may be the burden of life or whatever business they have to handle shortly. It is obvious from these people’s faces that this is a city which, for all its affluence, does not have much capacity for happiness. This observation is in line with the findings of the latest Smiling Report released by Better Business World Wide. Based on the investigation of Mystery Shopping Providers in 69 countries, Hong Kong is fifth from the bottom in terms of smiles offered by service providers in different industries.

They say that money cannot buy you happiness. Just ask the people of Hong Kong.

Out of the comfort zone, into the tires

I would be lying if I said I jumped at the chance of taking part in the Across Canada charity cycling tour. The truth is that it was after quite a length of internal struggle that enough mental hurdles were removed for me to muster the courage to express my interest to Michael, my friend and one of the organisers of the event.

The whole idea, for all its appeal, was simply overwhelming. The physical challenge itself sounds mighty formidable. Cycling Across Canada, in the wilderness, rain or shine, for ten weeks, covering a distance of over 7,500 km, averaging over 120 km of trudging per day. It simply doesn’t look like something I would be able to do. My previous ‘greatest’ daily biking achievements were all under 100 km and attained with total exhaustion, dead muscles and sore butt. Naturally, I had great doubts about my ability to achieve this mission impossible.

My wife’s initial response when I tested the water by sounding out the idea to her was far from encouraging. She made it starkly very clear that she thought the challenge would be too much for me and she didn’t support my participation. My hope of getting her endorsement to this grandiose commitment was immediately dashed.

The financial commitment is no less daunting. Apart from the CAD4,000 registration fees, which would cover some expenses for the trip, such as accommodation and some meals (which means one has to pay for the others), each participant has to raise CAD6,000 for charities. Any amount one cannot raise, he has to make up for it himself. Not taken to lobbying others for support, I had no confidence in securing donations anywhere near that amount, meaning that a big hole will be burnt in my pocket. I could also imagine that a lot needs to be spent on the gear and supplies to enable me to survive the ten weeks in the wild and being exposed to fickle conditions. That certainly would enlarge the hole in the pocket even further.

But commit myself I did, after much struggle. The opportunity was just too tempting to turn down. I have always admired people who have the courage and toughness to take long journey on a bike. And while I don’t think I will ever be able to emulate those who do it on their own, such as the Hong Kong young man who took 209 days to cycle 14,000 km from Germany back to Hong Kong in 2012, at the back of my mind, doing something similar, even remotely similar, remains a pipe dream that I secretly harbour. When I learnt about this event in which ten participants will cycle across Canada together, including some who have the experience of doing it before, and there will be a vehicle to support the trip, I knew this would be as close as I can ever get to achieving my dream. It is certainly going to be challenging, but what better way is there to push myself to new limits and get me out of my comfort zone than to take on this monumental journey?

There are other benefits, such as being able to see a lot of Canada on two wheels and raising money for charities, but they are just icing on the cake. Committing myself to pursue a dream, no matter what, in the hope of becoming a stronger and braver person, is a goal that tops it all.

How long to stay, and what to do

“One month is good. Two weeks are too short.”

This was the comment of the Korean driver who took us to the airport, upon learning that we were going home for a visit.

“After three weeks, you begin to think that you’ve had enough and it is about time to go,” he added.

It remains to be seen whether we will feel that way, but he has lived in Canada for fifteen years and returned to Korea a few times so he definitely knew what he was talking about.

*     *     *     *

“People, food, sauna.” The Korean driver named these as the three things he looks for when visiting his home country.

Hong Kong is, of course, not a place known for sauna. But I share his other reasons for going home. I miss the people I left behind.

I miss the different cuisines I was able to enjoy in Hong Kong, especially dim sum. In fact, my calendar has been filled with lunch and dinner appointments with friends and relatives, which naturally is my quest for having the two purposes fulfilled.

If I were to give a third reason for going back, it would be ‘activities’. Three weeks is not a long time, but I do hope to be able to do some hiking, play a game or two of tennis, or maybe go hiking with friends.

And nostalgia would be yet another reason. I certainly would like to revoke memories of this land which is my birthplace, which I left and which is likely to change beyond my recognition in the years to come.

Grand opening

A couple who are our friends will open a snack shop this Wednesday. To congratulate them, we will give them a pot of orchids. The pot plant provided inspiration for the design of a card to go with it.

As it turns out, I am fairly satisfied with the result.

Creativity kills the kid

The illustration on this page of a children’s book called “The Everything Seed”, which is a white dot on a completely black background, always reminds me of how my creativity, or my attempt at it, was dealt a blow in an art lesson in my primary school years. 

The learning objective of that lesson was etching. What we were told to do was to first use coloured pencils to fill the sheet of paper with rainbow colours, then use a crayon to smother the rainbow colours with a layer of black, and finally use a sharp bamboo stick to etch a picture on the black, the lines of which would reveal the rainbow colours underneath. I wanted to do something different from what my classmates were doing, which was to draw beautiful pictures of people or country scenes, so I just etched a single tiny dot.

The teacher walked around and commented on the students’ work. When he reached my desk, I was ready to explain my design concepts to him. But I was never given the chance. Concluding that I was fooling around, the furious teacher sharply scolded me before the whole class and ordered me to do what my classmates did.

So, ironically, it was in an art lesson that I learnt very early on that there are settings in life where creativity does not have a place.

Goo go!

A friend gave me a pumpkin a few weeks ago. I made a spooky face with paper and put the pumpkin out for decoration. Alas, the face was quickly deformed by rain.

Undeterred, I carved a jack-o-lantern and congratulated myself on the weatherproof masterpiece. Hardly did I expect that it would soon become a playground for small flies. Worse still, within a week, the thing turned mouldy and then just rotted. It looked so gross that it was perfect for Halloween, but there was no way the goo could hold out until the festival, which was still weeks away!

Sentimental moments

“There’ll be sentimental moments that will come without a trace: a place you’ve been to with Piper, a piece of clothing he wears, a special date that means something… and many little thoughts and connections.”

 This is the reminder by a friend who knows what it is like for me to lose Piper, her dear dad having passed away two years ago.

 There are so many sentimental moments. Piper, or the memory of him, is everywhere in the house, which now seems incredibly empty. The emptiness in every corner of the house where I expect to see Piper in serene repose brings an aching lump in my heart. Piper, who had no vision to depend on, always resorted to his sharp hearing. As soon as he heard the creaking of the rocking chair, he would know that someone was there, approach in his prancing gait, wait at the feet of whoever was sitting there and expect to be picked up to the lap.

All that is left now is the hollow and harrowing creaking.

Rainbow Bridge

The condolences offered by two friends on Piper's death were about Rainbow Bridge.

One said: "He will be happy to go to Rainbow Bridge, meeting new friends."

The other gave me a printout of the Rainbow Bridge poem:

"Just this side of heaven is a place called Rainbow Bridge.

"When an animal dies that has been especially close to someone here, that pet goes to Rainbow Bridge. There are meadows and hills for all of our special friends so they can run and play together. There is plenty of food, water and sunshine, and our friends are warm and comfortable.

"All the animals who had been ill and old are restored to health and vigor. Those who were hurt or maimed are made whole and strong again, just as we remember them in our dreams of days and times gone by. The animals are happy and content, except for one small thing; they each miss someone very special to them, who had to be left behind.

"They all run and play together, but the day comes when one suddenly stops and looks into the distance. His bright eyes are intent. His eager body quivers. Suddenly he begins to run from the group, flying over the green grass, his legs carrying him faster and faster.

"You have been spotted, and when you and your special friend finally meet, you cling together in joyous reunion, never to be parted again. The happy kisses rain upon your face; your hands again caress the beloved head, and you look once more into the trusting eyes of your pet, so long gone from your life but never absent from your heart.

"Then you cross Rainbow Bridge together...."

The sentence "and you look once more into the trusting eyes of your pet, so long gone from your life but never absent from your heart" just brought tears to my eyes. Piper, born blind, had no eyes, but all those years when we were together, I never failed to notice how Piper was able to see, not with his eyes but with his heart. How I yearn to look into those trusting "eyes" of his.

Mourning Piper

Piper, our darling cat, passed away peacefully this morning.

Piper was diagnosed with a disease called feline infectious peritonitis. What is absolutely horrible about this disease is that not only is there no cure for it but also it causes an infected cat to stop eating and produces severe discomfort which deprives the cat of a restful sleep. In Piper's case, his anorexia depleted him of nutrition, resulting in a rapid and alarming loss of weight, energy and strength. The accumulation of fluid in the abdomen, possibly combined with the inflammation of some internal organs, made him feel like something was constantly churning or burning inside. The great discomfort would make him jerk up every few minutes, switching postures in an attempt to find relief but never getting it. For days since the disease flared up, Piper had not been able to close his eyes and sleep for more than a couple of minutes. It was a very cruel torture and very sad to see.

Piper's wasting away and suffering had come to a point where we had to take the painful decision of putting him to sleep so as to put him out of his misery. It broke our hearts to let him go, but we realised that it was the best thing we could do for him under the tragic circumstances.

The loss of Piper has been harrowing, but we take solace from the knowledge that Piper has had a good life, his suffering is finally over, and he has been escorted by some angels to a happy place where eternal joy awaits.

Goodbye Piper, we have been so honoured and blessed
to have you come into our life.

Goals... How SMART

While organizing my files earlier today, I revisited these goals which I set for myself two and half years ago:

• Make a difference
• Travel
• Learn
• Get out of employment
• Make enough money to get by 

Drawn up in early January in 2014, these were meant to be some sort of new year resolutions. In examining them today, the following observations can be made:

• As is the case for most new year resolutions, they failed to serve any purpose as they were soon forgotten. For plans to have an impact, they have to be implemented and the progress and effectiveness of the implementation evaluated.
• Most of them do not serve well as goals. They did give some general ideas of the things I have always wanted to do, but their inadequacy becomes obvious when assessed against the criteria of SMART goals (Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Result-focused, Time-bound).
• Such shortcomings notwithstanding, I would like to think that those are the broad directions I have been following between then and now, and what is most gratifying is that I can proudly check the box for the item ‘get out of employment’, which obviously is the outcome of my conviction that I have ‘[made] enough money to get by’.

There is, of course, no room for complacency. Now that I am entirely responsible for the way I live my life and no longer have the excuse that I am so busy with my job that I have no time for anything else, goals have a vital role to play for giving direction and driving achievement. Setting some SMART goals is, therefore, an urgent task.

Love? Please define

There is nothing more distasteful than the way “love” has been commercialized and politicized in China and, increasingly and inevitably, Hong Kong.

Businesses from banks to cooking oil manufacturers make TV commercials which associate their services or products with love. Worse still, China and Hong Kong propagates love – love of the country, the region, the Communist Party, the people. What is this love anyway? The commercialized love lures you into spending your money. The politicized love lures you into sacrificing your life and, worse of all, even the lives of others. But what sort of love does the deeds of those in power demonstrate? Is their action compatible with their words?

Amazingly, though, many people buy this – people who, I believe, do not understand love; people who either have not loved or been loved.

Can money buy time?

Can we buy time with money?

In a way, it can. I'd like to think that is what I did three months ago, telling my boss that his service was no longer required and giving him the required notice.

Haven't I always felt that a person who finishes his work life at the retirement age (which is sixty for my generation and sixty-five for the next) is like letting his own battery run until it is about used up? While he is by then free to do whatever he didn't have the time to do while engaged in paid work, his energy, vigour or dynamism may well have deserted him.

Haven't I always resented the prospect of having to stay with my job until the retirement age? However, while this dream of retiring early was excruciatingly tempting, it was also incredibly intimidating. No mortal souls in their right minds, it seems, would be so reckless as to do something to stop the monthly pay cheque coming in and wreck their job security. I had, for so long, found this to be an impossible hurdle to cross.

But one thing I have never lost faith in is that if there is something you dream about or want badly and you are really determined to make it come true, it will. Early retirement is one such thing in my case. Living in another country is another. With God's guidance and help, I can now afford to buy a few years' time and start a new life in Canada. There is probably no better deal in life than to buy time with money.

A caged bird that finds the door open

On my last day at work, a colleague asked: "How do you feel?"

"I feel like a caged bird suddenly finding that the door has popped open," I said. "The bird just cocks its head quizzically, looking uncertainly outside."

Later that day, I told this to another friend, and his reply was: "The big wide world can be intimidating."

He should know. He must be feeling that way too when he retired a few years ago.

For most of us who have been doing paid work for a good part of our lives, the working life has done much to justify our existence and forge a sense of self-worth and security. We feel that our existence is justified when we are busy, even though it may not necessarily mean we are productive or contributing to the well-being of the world. We feel a sense of self-worth when we move up the ranks and there is power to wield and people to manage. The higher positions also give us a sense of security, as do the pay cheques that come at the end of each month.

So when one stops working, he can find the change all too dramatic. The bird in my imagination may well hesitate to walk out and prefer to stay in. It may be wondering: "Do I still know how to fly? Is it really a good idea to leave this cage where I am fed on a daily basis and put myself at the mercy of this strange and unknown world?"

One who has lost his freedom for too long may not be too eager to seek it and may not know how to enjoy it. He may, as my friend put it, just find it too "intimidating".

Dogs of different destinies

Two news stories on dogs today generated strong but completely different feelings in me.

The first one, published in a local paper, was about the ‘dog meat festival’ which took place yesterday in a city called Yulin in Guangxi, China. Animal rights activists who went to city to protest and to buy the dogs to rescue them were mocked by many onlookers and cursed by the vendors, the latter under the protection of the policemen.

The second news story was about the 2014 world’s ugliest dog contest which was held on Friday in California. According to the official website of the organiser, the contest aims to spread the message that no matter the dogs’ physical detractions, they are loving companions, and to raise awareness for adoption of dogs, since a good number of the contestant dogs have been rescued from shelters and puppy mills. This year’s winner, a Chihuahua-Shih Tzu mix called Peanut, is a good example. Peanut’s toothy grin and bulging eyeballs were the results of burns received as a puppy. Holly Chandler, his owner  plans to donate the prize money to pay for the veterinary bills of animals in need so that others might have the same opportunities as Peanut. She also hopes to use Peanut's fame to raise awareness for abused animals. 

It seems that, compared with the rest of the world, the civilisation of China still has a long way to go.

Moments of the Now

It must be sacrilegious, the sounds of my footsteps announcing my clumsy arrival.

This is the feeling I have as I descend from Quarry Gap to Tai Tam Reservoir every morning during the past two weeks. Treading on the trail traversing woods, streams and undergrowth of exquisite serenity, I feel like an intruder. I am not the only creature interfering with the silence and stillness - there are the birds, insects and reptiles, too, but they are doing a much better job, blending perfectly with the setting and orchestrating with the elements to add to the charm and sacredness.

Sometimes I would just hold my steps so as to let my Being become one with the silence and stillness. And those are the moments when I can truly appreciate the peace and joy of the Now.

Glitter in the gutter

Here's another lizard I saw during a another morning walk.

This one was less composed than the one I saw yesterday. It was in a gutter when spotted by me. Noticing me, it made a desperate attempt to seek shelter. The best bet would have been to scurry into the foliage on the side, but the steep walls of the gutter made it a daunting, and risky, task, so the poor thing just made one frantic dash forward after another, but still it could not get rid of me.

After following it with a sense of wicked fun for some distance, I decided to spare it of the fright and misery and walked away.